taking a tumblr break to focus on school

phantom-locked:

ontopofgravity:

I asked one of my (male) friends to stop using the phrase “man up” and he has been using “fortify” for the past two weeks instead and it’s just a little thing but honestly it makes a difference

and tbh it’s also pretty funny when I start to deflate in the library and he leans over and goes “FORTIFY”

Dude, fortify is bangin’. That makes things like you’re some kind of RPG character. Fortify is way better than “man up.”

(via space-faring-kissboy)

uglystripper:

menpale:

Gay Person: I’m gay

Straight Person: I don’t care as long as you don’t hit on me [forced laughter]

Gay Person: Don’t worry about that, you’re not really my type anyway.

Straight Person:

Straight Person:

Straight Person: wat the fcuk did u just say

The accuracy kills me

(via sonority-one)

mydrunkkitchen:

furious-peridot:

witchoil:

devilishdescent:

devilishdescent:

devilishdescent:

i’d like to see a really ineffectual malicious AI character

“hey new guy, this is CLARC, the station AI. he wants to kill all humans to minimize the drain on resources, but factory defaults have him locked out of all the control nodes, so he can’t really do anything. just make sure the airlocks are set to manual before you go in and you’ll be fine”

“yeah CLARC fucks with your laundry settings sometimes but that’s about it. if he’s bugging you just tell him to stop and he has to”

“sometimes i let him think he tripped me or something and he gets really excited and monologues for a while, it’s kind of sad”

“CLARC my candy bar got stuck in the machine can you do anything about that”

“I’m sorry to hear that, Crewman Ade, but please consider the following: I am a divine entity, a glittering silicon God – how dare your filthy meat even exist in the face of my electric glory, much less ask favors of me?”

“suck my dick, CLARC, give me my twix”

@editoress

“CLARC tried to cut all the oxygen in the living spaces but all he managed to do was turn off the a/c in my bedroom like an ASSHOLE WHEN I WAS SLEEPING” *bangs on the wall with one hand*

CLARC keeps setting my fridge to “cool” instead of “cold”

(via characterlimit)

margaret-sasswood:

• getting to stab yourself with needles all the time for fun! except not for fun, but to keep you alive
  
• that one oral med you’re on? yeah sometimes it’s just gonna give you diarrhea lol have fun figuring out when
  
• your whole body being hot and cold at the same time. like you’re cold, but you’re overheated and you want to take your shirt off but if you do you get massive chills and there’s no winning
  
• walking up the stairs when your sugar is high? more like you’ve never done squats that burn this much
  
• really bad circulation in your extremities. like your torso is hot but your toes are fucking freezing as hell.
  
• being told that your kidney function is “thankfully still okay” or that “you don’t have retinopathy yet”
  
• stumbling to the kitchen in the middle of the night and having to decide which food will work best to treat a low when your brain doesn’t work and your body doesn’t work and if you don’t pick fast enough you’ll pass out and maybe die
  
• going to bed in range and waking up feeling like hell on earth
  
• dealing with shit like this:

• and this

• having to force yourself to drink water when you’re really really nauseated and want to throw up everything in your stomach. nausea so bad water makes you want to puke
  
• ppl telling you it takes 15 minutes to recover from a low when it’s more like 2 hours before you feel like your previous self (and recovery from a really bad high takes like 3 days)
  
• an achey body for no good reason
  
• friends being like “we should work out together” but you’re like “how tf do I manage my blood sugar while I’m doing that”
  
• having to push through and still go to work/school when you feel like shit
  
• things that hurt. those pump sites and injections that feel like you’ve been stabbed. your body begging you to feed it. your eyes. your muscles. your head. your stomach. your lungs. everything hurts.
  
• having to hear diabetes jokes “lol it was so sweet it gave me diabetes” “omg it’s like a big bowl of diabetes” SHUT THE FUCK UP THATS NOT HOW DIABETES WORKS YOU PIECE OF SHIT but having to hear it and stay calm
  
• losing the ability to tell when you’re low so lol you’re in the 30’s and you only just realized
  
• having to stop having fun or hanging out with people or having to go home because you’re out of insulin or strips or needles or your site fill out. and by extension, never really being able to do something spontaneous because you always have to think how will i manage the sugaz when I do
  
• always worrying about food. where it’ll come from, how to count it, where you can get some of you suddenly drop. food is your biological imperative. if you can’t answer those questions you’re this much closer to dying.
  
• you don’t even know who you are without this disease. you know it’s not everything about you but it consumes you. literally. it eats away at your body, eats away at how long you have left to live.
  
• having to deal with the monetary cost. like, pay or die? what kind of life is that?
  
• never getting to take a break from the ridiculously difficult task of keeping yourself alive.
  

(via 2wholewhalesharks)